Media Blackout

Aug 24, 2005 at 12:00 am
Carbonatix Pre-Player Loader

Audio By Carbonatix

Welcome to the pro-logo, digitally watermarked, registered-trademark, global-conglomerate, slave-labor-sweatshop-manufactured and genetically modified edition of MB45! • The Daughtermelons™Rindhouse (Seed Spitter) :: What a great name for an all girl rock ’n’ roll band! Unfortunately they don’t exist because I thought up the name myself. But when Kim Fowley steals it, just remember that you read it here first. • Bob DylanLive At The Gaslight 1962 (Sony) :: He would’ve played at a Starbucks but there weren’t any 43 years ago. • Federation XRally Day (Estrus!) :: This follow-up to X Patriot includes some good Ted Nugent meets Page Hamilton singing, some good Grand Funk meets Kyuss playing and some truly atrocious Terry Knight meets Helen Keller sound production that’s so bad it’s good. • Naomi KleinNo Logo (Picador) :: Logos are bad. Unless of course it’s the trendy designer logo that’s plastered on the front cover of your own overrated, overhyped and overstocked delete bin book. • Bob DylanLive At Starbucks (Starbucks Music) :: Well he’s a Starbucker, Starbucker, Starbucker, Starbucker star. Oh, yes you are, yes you are. • Billy Joel™Always Crashing In The Same Car (Bye Bye Brinkley) :: Kids, never give your money to anyone who has a registered trademark symbol next to their name on an album cover. • SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: T.A.G.C. Meontological Research RecordingsTeste Tones (Soleilmoon) :: Still using Metal Machine Music to buff your brainpan shiny? Then it’s time to upgrade to this sonic tonic that’s so potent it packs a proviso: Warning Care Should Be Taken During Playback Of The Recording As Certain Frequency Information Could Damage Under-Specified Loudspeakers At High Db Levels. Yeah, like that stopped me from cranking it up. • Be seeing you!

Jeffrey Morgan is a freelance writer. Send comments to [email protected]