MAYBE HE'S MORE A PEPSI KINDA GUY...

According to "Queen of All Media" Perez Hilton and the little less hysterical NME, our former homeboy Jack White is none too pleased about the James Bond theme he wrote as a duet for himself and Alicia Keys being featured in a new Coke commercial (didn't he read the contract?) before making its debut in any other medium.

According to both sites, Mr. White has issued the following statement via his handlers (didn't they read the contract??):

"Jack White was commissioned by Sony Pictures to write a theme song for the James Bond film Quantum Of Solace, not for Coca Cola. Any other use of the song is based on decisions made by others, not by Jack White. "We are disappointed that you first heard the song in a co-promotion for Coke Zero, rather than in its entirety."

Actually, our favorite comment on Perez's site following his post is: "Who the f-- is Jack White?" It would be cool (and a lot better for this city's music scene, imho) if more Detroiters adopted that same sentiment. It looks like the citizens of Los Angeles may already have done so, by the way:

Actually, when push comes to shove, the new song ain't bad at all...though the cynical among us have to wonder if Jack will be giving any of his royalties from the song to John Barry:

I think this may be a joke (but thanks to the wonderful Ms. Eve Doster Knepp for sending it my way):

ON EDIT: Eve has just informed me that the below is NOT a joke; it's a real Coke commercial that Jack White wrote the music for several years ago...and which only aired in Australia (we think!) but definitely not America. Thus, one has to wonder as to why he's so outraged. After all, he's written for Coke in the past. (Perhaps the fact that the James Bond one is the better of the two...?):

I think Jack may be old enough (maybe not), btw, to remember a time when sometimes songs were actually TV commercials before they became pop-rock hits:

And the Carpenters' "We've Only Just Begun" was a bank commercial before it was a hit for the bro and sis team...

Of course, Jack's star will only continue to rise with the forthcoming release of It Might Get Loud, a documentary film which premiered this month at the Toronto Film Festival. The film, from Academy Award winning (for An Inconvenient Truth) Davis Guggenheim, tells the personal stories, in their own words, of three generations of electric guitar virtuosos - -Jimmy Page, The Edge and our Jack. One scene that'll probably make MT's Michael Hurtt happy is that Jack finally gives credit to Flat Duo Jets leader Dex Romweber for the latter's influence on the White Stripes' sound. As Jack recently told a reporter: Dex Romweber was and is a huge influence on my music. I owned all of his records as a teenager, and was thrilled at the fact that we were able to play together recently on tour. His attitude towards music is remarkable. His songwriting, along with his love of classic American music from the south, be it rockabilly, country or R&B, is one of the best kept secrets of the rock 'n' roll underground."

Finally, in conclusion, one has to wonder where in the hell Perez Hilton found an artist to draw that image of him that proudly kicks off his Website:

Fantasy...

Reality...

Geez, I'm such a bitch...

Have a great day, kids...

P.S. Sony/BMG keeps removing that damn Coke commercial on youtube...so I'll just keep posting it here at the end of this item...as long as some enterprising soul keeps reposting it there: