Media Blackout

Step right up! Don't be shy! Who'll be the first rube to empty their pockets? It's the clairvoyant crystal ball edition of MB39! • Live 8 (Shell Out for UNICEF) :: Bangladesh. Live Aid. Nicaragua. Farm Aid. Kampuchea. Band Aid. There's nothing like a bunch of multimillionaire rock stars supporting their personal pet projects on the backs of their loyal fans. The lineup to get fleeced forms to the left. • CREEM Magazine — August 1981 (Page 53) :: I was right then and I'm right now. You could look it up. • Celine Dion – "Not Leaving On A Jet Plane" b/w "Not Leaving Las Vegas" (Rich And Lazy) :: I guess no one bothered to tell Mrs. Howard Hughes that it's called "Live 8" not "Live Video Feed 8." • Muhammad Ali, George Foreman, James Brown, B.B. King, Miriam Makeba, the Pointer SistersThe Rumble In the Jungle (Don King) :: At least they had the guts to actually go there. • SparksComplaints (Island) :: It's not my department. • The Ladies and GentlemenSmall Sins (Boompa) :: At first listen, one-man band Thomas D'Arcy sounds kinda like the Frausdots — which is good. Then you begin to realize that he just might be the new Bryan Ferry — which is even better. • FugueMysterious Animals (RiYL) :: "Frankie Teardrop" Suicide? "The Pleasures of Interstate Trucking" Big Black? "Caligari's Mirror" Pere Ubu? Whatever your poison, this ripe tornado of torment is guaranteed to provide Fast! Fast! Relief! from life's sunny moments. FDA approval not pending. • SIZZLING PREDICTION OF THE YEAR: Media Blackout #13I Told You So (Dec. 15, 2004) :: "Start saving your pennies now because there are only seven months left until Live Aid 2005: The 20th Anniversary Con Job." • Baa seeing you.

Jeffrey Morgan is a freelance writer. Send comments to letters@metrotimes.com