20 things only Detroiters are obsessed with

By Metro Times editorial staff on Wed, Nov 13, 2024 at 7:49 pm

Detroiters are just built different. They’ll complain about the city, but once an outsider does, they’ll defend it to the death — and rep a T-shirt to show it. Then again, if you claim to be from Detroit when you’re from, say, Grosse Pointe, you’ll never be forgiven. And something like a square Detroit-style pizza, Vernors, or the humble coney dog is probably completely baffling to anyone not from here. File these under “It’s a Detroit thing, you wouldn’t understand.”

Tags:

Scroll down to view images

Shutterstock

Arguing over how “Detroit” you are

In other cities, some people are born there, while others move in. Here, there’s always a competition over who is considered a real Detroiter — who actually lives in city limits, and for how long. Which is fair, because after years of ignoring Detroit it’s now trendy for suburbanites to claim the city — at least until you ask them which intersection they grew up near.

Skyler Murry

City pride T-Shirts

Whether you want the world to know it’s “Detroit vs. Everybody,” that “Detroit Hustles Harder,” or that you were “Born in Detroit,” there’s no shortage of local city pride T-shirts to choose from.

1 of 20

Andrew Jameson, Flickr Creative Commons

The Eastside/Westside rivalry

When Detroiters ask each other what neighborhood they grew up in, the only correct answers are Eastside or Westside. It’s like asking someone’s astrological sign.

2 of 20

Armando Madero, Detroit Stock City

Cars

Well, we are the Motor City for a reason. Not only was Detroit seemingly built for automobiles and not humans, but Detroiters will judge you based on what kind of car you drive — especially if it’s not made by the Big Three.

3 of 20

Shutterstock

Vernors

For many people, it’s just another ginger ale. To Detroiters, Vernors is an elixir that they swear can cure any ailment known to mankind.

4 of 20

Joe Maroon

Tigers Opening Day

Ah, Opening Day in Detroit: It’s like a spring mating ritual that always ends in public drunkenness, urination, and obscene amounts of litter. Oh, and there’s a baseball game, too.

5 of 20

Lee DeVito

Coney dogs

What tastes better than a hot dog smothered in chili, mustard, and onions when you’re drunk downtown at 3 a.m.? Answer: nothing.

6 of 20

Shutterstock

Cartier Buffs

Cartier sunglasses are a status symbol here, particularly the French luxury retailer’s C Décor buffalo horn frames, aka “Buffs.” You’ll see them sported by rappers and anyone who wants to stunt on their haters. Gov. Gretchen Whitmer was even gifted a pair, the highest honor from Detroit’s streets.

8 of 20

Shutterstock

Which high school you went to

Did you go to Cass, Renaissance, King, or one of those irrelevant neighborhood schools? We said what we said.

9 of 20

Liza Lagman Sperl, Flickr Creative Commons

Paczki Day

Sure, New Orleans and St. Louis have Mardis Gras, but in Detroit, everyone’s a little Polish on Fat Tuesday.

10 of 20

City of Detroit, Flickr Creative Commons

Devil’s Night

A night of mischief on the night before Halloween is a Detroit tradition that goes back to the 1930s, but Devil’s Night took a more sinister turn as the city’s economy bottomed out and vandalism escalated to arson. Thanks to a volunteer-led Angels’ Night campaign, however, Devil’s Night arsons have largely ceased.

11 of 20

Shutterstock

The Lions

Why do so many Detroiters tune in every Sunday to root for these perennial losers? Is it masochism? Finding community in shared misery? Or maybe it’s simply living by Detroit’s official motto: “We hope for better things, it will rise from the ashes.”

12 of 20

Filmgod, Flickr Creative Commons

Detroit-style pizza

While the rest of the world finally seems to be catching onto our square slices — Pizza Hut and DiGiorno have recently gotten into the Detroit-style pizza game — here we argue about which is better: Buddy’s, Cloverleaf, Loui’s…

13 of 20

Lee DeVito

Celebrity lawyers

Sure, every city in the U.S. has their own Better Call Saul, but Detroit’s celebrity lawyers have to be among the most eccentric, from Geoffrey Fieger’s unsuccessful run for governor, to Mike Morse photoshopping himself on a billboard to look like he survived a physical fight, to the glamor and mystique of Joumana Kayrouz.

14 of 20

Shutterstock

Talking about the weather

As they say, if you don’t like the weather in Michigan, then wait five minutes.

15 of 20

Mike Pfeiffer

The Nain Rouge

According to local lore, Detroit was cursed when its founder Antoine de la Mothe Cadillac ignored a fortune teller’s warning and whacked a little red dwarf called the Nain Rouge with his cane. In recent years we celebrate the story with the Marche du Nain Rouge parade, though we can’t seem to agree on whether the curse can be reversed by driving Nain out of town or by appeasing him instead.

16 of 20

Joe Maroon

Eminem

A relic of early 2000s pop culture at large, the best-selling rapper of all time’s presence still looms large over the city — from launching a restaurant called Mom’s Spaghetti to newer emcees like Sada Baby still debating his place on the “Mount Rushmore of Detroit rappers.”

17 of 20

JasonParis, Flickr Creative Commons

Discussing the city’s history — warts and all

From the the Great Fire of 1805 immortalized on the city’s flag, to the race riots of 1943, to the uprising of 1967, or the destruction associated with the Tigers’ 1984 World Series win, the city’s tumultuous history is ingrained into its fabric.

18 of 20

Drew Tarvin, Flickr Creative Commons

Belle Isle’s giant slide

Riding down the giant slide on Belle Isle is a right of passage — if you survive. Historically, riders only had to worry about burning their legs on the sun-baked slide, but now that the yellow coating is gone, it’s more slippery than it used to be. Beware.

19 of 20

Shutterstock

Defending Detroit to outsiders

For as tough as things can be here, Detroiters will be the first ones to defend the city when outsiders trash it. As the old advertising campaign says, “Say nice things about Detroit!”

20 of 20