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  • The Ypsilanti mystery pooper saga continues

    Ypsilanti police are still searching for the person dubbed the “mystery pooper.” Someone has been, as the Associated Press politely puts it today, “soiling slides at an Ypislanti playground over the last six months.” So, of course, someone purchased an electronic billboard along I-94 near Huron St. at exit 183 that delivers multiple calls for action: For instance,”Help us flush the pooper.” The company that purchased the billboard, Adams Outdoor Advertising, knows how to reach the world in the 21st Century, branding each billboard with a hashtag for the public utilize in its efforts: #ypsipooper. WJBK-TV says the billboard also toggles through other rich lines, such as: “Do your civic doody, report the pooper #YPSIPOOPER” “Help us catch the poopetrator #YPSIPOOPER.” You can have the runs, but you can’t hide. They’re still looking for you, Mystery Pooper.

    The post The Ypsilanti mystery pooper saga continues appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • City Slang: DJ AvA, Chuck Flask & Keith Kemp preview Movement at Urban Bean Co.

    It’s a really, very cool idea. Paxahau, the good people behind the Movement Electronic Music Festival, are hosting a series of warm-up events, or previews, to the big festival which takes place Memorial Day weekend. On Thursday evening, Movement moved into the Urban Coffee Bean on Grand River in Detroit. While Dj AvA and Chuck Flask & Keith Kemp ably worked the decks, the regular coffee shop goings on continued behind them. It made for an interesting and amusing webcast experience – one guy was taking a nap on camera, while others supped coffee and tappd their feet. It should come as no surprise – the Urban Coffee Co. people have always been big supporters of electronic music. The place includes a DJ stand, and co-owner Josh Greenwood encourages customers to bring their own vinyl and spin on the open turntables. Not on Thursday night though. This being a coffee shop, and it not being particularly late at night, the music remained pretty chill throughout. DJ AvA (real name Heather McGuigan) includes Beth Orton, Madonna, the B-52’s, Daftpunk and David Byrne among her list of influences, so you know that she’s capable of both whipping up a storm and also […]

    The post City Slang: DJ AvA, Chuck Flask & Keith Kemp preview Movement at Urban Bean Co. appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Here is why landlords could do well in Wayne County

    CNN has a message to all prospective landlords: Head to Wayne County! Occupancy and rental rates are increasing, the report says, creating an opportunity for serious returns on investments. In fact, after comparing the median sales price of homes to average monthly rents in nearly 1,600 counties, RealtyTrac found that Detroit’s Wayne County offers landlords the best return on their investment in the nation. Investors who buy homes in the metro area can expect a 30% gross annual return from rents. That’s triple the national average of 10%. RealtyTrac, an online real estate information company, says the county offers investors low prices for larger homes — with a median price of $45,000. “We’ve got some steals here,” said Rachel Saltmarshall, a real estate agent and immediate past president of the Detroit Association of Realtors, told CNN. “There’s a six-bedroom, 6,000 square-foot home in a historic district selling for $65,000.” For more, read the entire report here.

    The post Here is why landlords could do well in Wayne County appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • The Record Store Day Guide for metro Detroit

    This Saturday, audiophiles across the world will venture out to their favorite independent record stores in search of limited releases that quickly become collectors items. The third Saturday of April marks the fairly new international holiday Record Store Day. There are certainly dos and don’ts to know for RSD — like where to shop, and how to shop. That’s right, there is an etiquette to shopping on Record Store Day and violating that code makes you look like a real asshole. In my experience of celebrating Record Store Day, I’ve seen stores use a few different tactics as far as stocking the special releases. Some establishments will set up a table, somewhere in the store, where a few shoppers at a time can flip through records in a calm and contained manner. Other places will have a similar setup, with all the releases at a table, but shoppers ask the store employees for the releases they want. It’s like a record nerd stock exchange. This process gets loud, slightly confusing and incredibly annoying — this is where elbows start getting thrown. Then, there are places that put the releases on the shelves, usually categorized by size — twelve inches with the twelve inches, seven inches with the seven inches and […]

    The post The Record Store Day Guide for metro Detroit appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • City Slang: DEMF 2014 canceled

    The Detroit Electronic Music Festival, which was supposed to be making a triumphant return this year, has been canceled. A statement on the website says that the festival will be back in 2015. Back in November, Ford Field hosted an announcement party for DEMF, where it was revealed that a new DEMF festival would take place at Campus Martius Park in Detroit over the July 4th weekend. “I’m proud to be involved in the biggest and best electronic music festival in the world,” said Juan Atkins. “The future’s here. This is techno scene.” Not the immediate future, apparently. The DEMF people claim that the M-1 rail construction is partially to blame for the cancellation/12-month-postponement. Read the full statement here. Follow @City_Slang

    The post City Slang: DEMF 2014 canceled appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Metro Times wins heavy at the SPJ Awards

    Despite a turbulent 2013 which saw Metro Times change owners, move buildings and change editors twice, we picked up eight awards at the Society of Professional Journalists Awards on Wednesday night. The big winner was Robert Nixon, design manager, who picked up a first place for “Feature Page Design (Class A)” for our Josh Malerman cover story, first for “Cover Design (Class A)” for our Halloween issue (alongside illustrator John Dunivant), and a second in that same category for our annual Lust issue. In the news categories, our esteemed former news editor and current contributing writer Curt Guyette won third in “General News Reporting” and third in “Best Consumer/Watchdog” – both Class A – for the Fairground Zero and Petcoke Series respectively. Music & Culture Editor Brett Callwood placed third for his Josh Malerman cover story in the “Best Personality Profile (Class A)” category, and former editor Bryan Gottlieb picked up a couple of Class C awards for “Editorial Writing” and “Headline Writing” (third and second, respectively). We were also pleased to learn that our investigative reporter Ryan Felton won first place and an honorable mention for work published while at the Oakland Press. The MT ship is steady now, […]

    The post Metro Times wins heavy at the SPJ Awards appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

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Cover Story

The five people you meet in college

The archetypal students, and how to handle them

Appearance:

Blond hair

iPhone

Parents' credit card

Grande, skinny, no-whip vanilla latte

Bag emblazoned with sorority letters

Chanel sunglasses

Hard Tail yoga pants (though never seen coming to or from yoga)


Common questions: "can I put that on my card?" or [in awestruck tone] "You do your own laundry?"


Academic habits: Attends class for purely social reasons. Otherwise skips to go shopping for sunglasses, art supplies or, if it's rush season, friends.


Often found: Traveling in packs, typically three to 18 deep.


iPod playlist: A whole playlist of Adele remixes, Nicki Minaj, Bruno Mars, Eminem and the Script.


Key words: "Like," "sorostitute," "box wine."


Pros: Has been in a protective, upper-middle-class bubble so long she will not challenge you with reality.


Cons: Strains and elevates her voice to match the standard sorority pitch. Easily bored or annoyed.


How to bluff: Ask her if she's a natural blonde, or if she knows of any good coffee shops.

The Star Athlete

Appearance:

Sunglasses

Aura of superiority

Entire wardrobe dictated by the athletic department


Common questions: "What's the score?" and "Did we have a test last week?"


Academic habits: Sometimes comes to class just to see what it's like, leaving as soon as he's consumed the two Muscle Milks and three CLIF Bars he has in his backpack.


Often found: Travels only with other athletes, or within rotating clouds of groupies.


iPod playlist: Rick Ross, "Eye of the Tiger" by Survivor, any generic rap or hard rock.


Key words: "Protein," "sweats," "practice."


Pros: Hang with him at the bar and you won't wait in lines or pay for drinks.


Cons: Won't hang with you at the bar.


How to bluff: Just steer away of mentioning the fact that only a very small percentage of college athletes are able to make a career out of their sport.

The stoner

Appearance:

Slouchy beanie

Thin, bright coat of eyeliner contrasted with stark red eyes

Lazy posture

Oversized Joy Division T-shirt (beneath a hemp baja hoodie in the winter months)

Thrift store jeans or long, flowing skirt

Sandals or Converse tennis shoes


Accessories: glass chillum, eye drops, hacky-sack, potent-smelling Ziploc bag


Common questions: "What?"


Academic habits: Surprisingly, often shows up to class and appears totally absorbed, but confuses professor when she flunks a simple test then explains she thought the class was on a different subject (for several weeks ...).


Often found: Blissed-out in her dorm room atop a pile of avant-garde magazines, or harshed-out in the cafeteria by the bogus food with her headphones on.


iPod playlist: Sublime, Bob Marley, Pink Floyd, Wiz Khalifa and stock nature sounds


Key words: "Dude," "peace," "Kush," "I forgot."


Pros: Relatively free with bud, won't raid your beer.


Cons: Won't wear shoes unless forced to. Won't remember who you are the next time you see her.


How to bluff: Tell her about your attempts to get a medical card, or repeat her pro-legalization arguments back to her.

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