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  • Detroit’s grand bargain still needs Lansing’s approval

    In this week’s Metro Times we took a look at the state legislature’s role in Detroit’s ongoing bankruptcy — in particular, how it must approve a $350 million pledge for the so-called “grand bargain” to remain intact. And, with last night’s announcement of a significant deal between the city and Detroit’s pension boards and retiree groups, the ball is Lansing’s court now. The new deal, first reported by the Freep, would cut general employees monthly pension checks by 4.5 percent and eliminate their cost-of-living increases. Police and fire retirees would see no cuts to monthly checks, while their cost-of-living increases would be reduced from 2.25 percent to 1 percent. Under the original offer, police and fire retirees cuts were as high as 14 percent, with general retirees as high as 34 percent, that is, if the groups rejected the “grand bargain,” an $816 million proposal funded by foundations, the state, and the DIA to shore up pensions. The sweeter deal for pensions, though, it must be noted, entirely relies on the state legislature approving $350 million for Detroit’s bankruptcy.  And while this broke after Metro Times went to press, that was the focal point of this week’s News Hits column — so, it’s worth repeating: The […]

    The post Detroit’s grand bargain still needs Lansing’s approval appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • City Slang: Local releases for Record Store Day on Saturday

    This Saturday, April 19, is Record Store Day, and there is plenty going on in metro Detroit and Michigan. Of special interest to us is Chiodos’ 7” single “R2ME2/Let Me Get You A Towel,” Mayer Hawthorne & Shintaro Skamoto’s 7” “Wine Glass Woman/In a Phantom,” Chuck Inglish & Action Bronson’s 7” “Game Time,” Chuck Inglish & Chance the Rapper’s 7” “Glam,” Chuck Inglish & Chromeo’s 7” “Legs,” Chuck Inglish, Mac Miller & Ab-Soul’s 7” “Easily,” James Williamson’s 7” “Open Up and Bleed/Gimme Some Skin,” Black Milk’s 12” “Glitches in the Break,” Mayer Hawthorne’s 10” “Jaded Inc.,” Wayne Kramer & the Lexington Arts Ensemble’s 12” “Lexington,” and best of all, Ray Parker Jr.’s 10” “Ghostbusters.” We wrote about James Williamson’s release this week. Go shop. Follow @City_Slang

    The post City Slang: Local releases for Record Store Day on Saturday appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • City Slang: Margaret Doll Rod to play EP release show in May

    Margaret Doll Rod will celebrate the release of her new EP, Margaret, with a show at PJ’s Lager House on Saturday, May 10. A statement reads, “The EP contains 3 new original songs and one Chrome Cranks cover with Italian actress Asia Argento singing background vocals. Margaret moved to Italy after the end of the Demolition Doll Rods where she still lives touring and performing festivals in Europe. The Dollrods were a Garage Rock force for over 20 years, opening for Iggy, Jon Spencer, The Scientist, The Monks and The Cramps. Margaret was the front person and principal songwriter for The Dollrods. Her chief musical foil was Danny Kroha, who joined the Demolition Doll Rods after the now legendary Gories called it quits. Margaret’s sister, Christine, on drums, rounded out the legendary trio. Margaret will do a special performance in the round that night with a 360 degree revolving stage and special guest DJ Adam Stanfel.” The bill will also feature the Stomp Rockets and the Volcanos. Follow @City_Slang

    The post City Slang: Margaret Doll Rod to play EP release show in May appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • City Slang: Music review roundup

    Send CDs, vinyl, cassettes, demos and 8-tracks to Brett Callwood, Metro Times, 1200 Woodward Heights, Ferndale MI 48220. Email MP3s and streaming links to bcallwood@metrotimes.com. Ricky Rat’s Tokyo Pop/Glitter People (New Fortune) 7” single highlights all that’s great about the Trash Brats guitarist, but also his limitations. The man can write a bubblegum rock ’n’ roll song to match anyone in the city and most beyond. He’s also a killer guitarist, ripping out one throwaway riff after another with reckless abandon. He’s a machine. On his own though, without Trash Brats frontman Brian McCarty, his voice doesn’t have enough strength to do the songs justice. Not that you need to have the greatest voice in the world to sing this stuff – you don’t need to be able to perform vocal gymnastics – but you do have to be able to wail the tunes out. Both of the songs on this single are great, but you can’t help but wonder how much better they would sound with McCarty or somebody similar talking the mic. Still, as they are the songs are great fun. We’re just being picky. The Paper Sound’s Trajectories is a dense, atypically dark Americana-tinged album, unrelenting and […]

    The post City Slang: Music review roundup appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Detroit launches website to auction city-owned homes

    “Neighbors wanted.” That’s the message on the homepage of buildingdetroit.org, a new website launched by the City of Detroit today to auction off city-owned homes to prospective buyers who pledge to fix them up and move in. “We are moving aggressively to take these abandoned homes and get families living in them again,” Mayor Mike Duggan said in a statement today. “There are a lot of people who would love to move into many of our neighborhoods. Knowing that other people are going to be buying and fixing up the other vacant homes at the same time will make it a lot easier for them to make that commitment.” The website to facilitate the auctions went live this afternoon. The first auction is scheduled to take place Monday, May 5. Officials said in a news release that one home will be auctioned per day, Monday through Friday. Fifteen homes are available for sale on the site, a dozen of which are in the East English Village neighborhood. Any Michigan resident, company, or organization that can do business in the state can bid, according to the website. Properties will be for sale for only one day, with bidding taking place from 8 […]

    The post Detroit launches website to auction city-owned homes appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Tickets for Steven Spielberg, John Williams summer concert sell out in 15 minutes

    In case you haven’t heard, two of the biggest names in film, Steven Spielberg and John Williams, are collaborating to put on a benefit concert for the Detroit Symphony Orchestra this summer. In case you wanted to go- well, you’re too damn late. The DSO says tickets to the June 14 concert were snapped up in a record-breaking 15 minutes after they went on sale at 9 a.m. today. The DSO has since released this statement to fans who didn’t snag seats: Our apologies to everyone who was unable to buy tickets this morning for our historic benefit concert featuring John Williams and Steven Spielberg. Despite increasing our phone and internet system capacity for the day, a surge of hundreds of ticket buyers purchased tickets in a matter of minutes, filling the phone lines and temporarily maxing out our web servers. After a one-hour pre-sale made available to donors and subscribers at 8am, we released additional seats at 9am to the general public, including seats available for as low as $30. All seats sold out immediately. The concert program seems nothing short of top notch: Williams will conduct the orchestra as it performs some of his most iconic tunes, such […]

    The post Tickets for Steven Spielberg, John Williams summer concert sell out in 15 minutes appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

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Savage Love

Spit or swallow?

He wants a pretty dramatic climax, but she just wants to swallow

Q: I love reading your column and never thought that I would have a reason to write to you, but to my pleasure and chagrin, I realized today that I could use your help.

I am a 23-year-old woman. I have been with my boyfriend for three years, and we have lived together for two. We have a very healthy sex life, and the longer we are together, the better it gets! There is just one problem: He wants me to get really raunchy with his come when I am blowing him. I guess it's called an "oral creampie." Anyway, he wants to shoot on my face with my mouth open, he wants me to let him come in my mouth and then let it drool back out on my chin or his cock, all kinds of things in that vein. I would LOVE to do that for him — but when it's go time, I freeze and can't bring myself to do it and end up swallowing his come instead.

Honestly, I think the thought of come bothers me. I can swallow it because once I do, it's gone and I don't have to worry about it — but with this, I have to play with it and run it all around in my mouth. I need to know how to embrace his come instead of fearing it so our sex life can continue to grow instead of stagnate on this one thing. Help! —Frozen Creampie

A: According to Urban Dictionary — the final authority on all sex definitions these days — an "oral creampie" isn't anywhere near as involved a process as your boyfriend makes it out to be.

"While receiving a blow job," says Urban Dictionary, "the alpha male peaks to orgasm — while the male is in the midst of ejaculation, or cumming, the female continues the act of oral sex without removing her lips and/or mouth from the alpha males penis — thus, causing the male to cum inside the females mouth, and possibly down her throat while she is still sucking the males penis."

Beyond all that awful punctuation, you gotta love how the alpha male — no blow jobs for you beta males — "peaks to orgasm" all by himself. He isn't brought to orgasm thanks to the determined efforts of a giving partner. No. A blow job is something alpha males do for themselves. There he is, our alpha male, peaking to orgasm all on his own, when suddenly a woman trips and falls face-first into his lap.

Anyway, FC, it looks like you're doing the oral creampie already: You're blowing him; you're swallowing. Your boyfriend is asking you for what we're going to call "more." And this isn't something he's asking you to do "when [you're] blowing him," but after you're done blowing him. Because once he comes, FC, the blow job is technically over. Emission accomplished. So he's asking for a blow job-and-then-some, an above-and-beyond-the-call post-blow job indulgence.

A couple of thoughts ...

Presumably, your boyfriend eats your pussy. And when he does, FC, he gets your vaginal secretions all over his face — it's smeared all over his chin and cheeks and nose and lips. It's applied gradually, in layers, like a varnish. There's a big difference between your secretions and his — he comes all at once, in a few massive splats — but if he's eating your pussy, FC, he's already doing a slo-mo version of what he's asking you to do for him.

But even so, FC, your boyfriend has to recognize the above-and-beyond nature of the request he's making. He's getting head — good, enthusiastic head too, as evidenced by all the alpha orgasms he's peaking. And there you are, only too happy to swallow — even if your true motive is to dispose of his semen as quickly as possible. It seems to me that 1) your boyfriend shouldn't push this oral creampie thing too hard and 2) you shouldn't feel too bad if you can't bring yourself to do this for him anytime soon.

Your inability to do this one thing — this one above-and-beyond thing — shouldn't be allowed to "derail" an otherwise excellent sex life. Your sex life can "continue to grow" even if this particular act won't be scratched off the boyfriend's bucket-o-come list anytime soon. Do the stuff you enjoy, try new things, continue to grow together. And maybe play with his come a little bit along the way — masturbate him sometimes, or let him masturbate himself, and run your fingers through his come — and perhaps your fears and inhibitions will decrease and one day you'll be able to enjoy his juices (a word I hate in this context) just as much as he enjoys yours.

And he does enjoy yours, right? Because if he isn't eating your pussy, FC, then you shouldn't even be blowing him, much less feeling guilty about not gargling with his come after you're done.


Q:
I grew up in a shitty conservative town with a batshit crazy mother and a philandering father who, despite leaving my mom when I was 2, went on to be a pretty good dad and definitely the only moderately stable parent in my life. I wanted his love and approval. I went to law school and married a guy who was, essentially, my dad. They became best friends. Very shortly into the marriage, I fell in love with a woman, realized I'm a total homo, and got divorced. I'm still with the same woman and I'm no longer suicidal over my internalized homophobia. Yay.

My dad didn't exactly support my decision, but he has made an effort to get to know my girlfriend and isn't acting quite as crushed as I know he was when I came out and divorced my husband.

However, he continues to have a relationship with my ex-husband. This enrages me. I felt like he sided with the ex at every turn during our separation and divorce, and now I feel like he's incapable of understanding my feelings. I'm still friendly with my ex, although I have tremendous guilt issues over not having figured myself out before dragging him into a marriage. My dad's point is that his friendship with my ex has nothing to do with me.

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