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    The post Twerk du Soleil shakes up Detroit appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Poll shows Bob Ficano behind in Wayne County Executive race

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    The post Poll shows Bob Ficano behind in Wayne County Executive race appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • A Mad Decent Mixtape

    Mad Decent Block Party will roll through town on Saturday, August 16, bringing to town artists like Dillon Francis, Diplo, Flosstradamus, RiFF RAFF, Keys N Krates, and Zeds Dead. Thugli, a Canadian duo, will perform on the Toronto leg of the tour and they put together a 45 minute mix that features songs by some of the tour’s featured artists as well as a host of others.  Listen to it here. 

    The post A Mad Decent Mixtape appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Tangent Gallery to host Breaking Borders

    Detroit’s Tangent Gallery will host a special event this Saturday, July 26 in hopes of raising money for the local faction of an international nonprofit, Burners without Borders Detroit. Breaking Borders is a one-evening-only event that will feature live music, performance, and art. Satori Circus will perform along with spoken word artist ZakAndWhatArmy. Music by Tartanic, Dixon’s Violin, and Servitor. Fire dancers, hoop performers, and acrobats will provide a certain mysticism to the ambiance as old Victorian steampunk and tribal art is shown in the main gallery. There will also be a runway fashion show and the evening will end with a dubstep rave featuring DJ Forcefeed and Dotty. Truly, there’s something for everyone. Perhaps more importantly, there will be a full service bar. The event is open to those 18 and older and IDs will be checked at the door. Admission is $25 at the door, or $20 with the donation of a canned good. Doors open at 7 p.m. and the party goes until 2 a.m. A 20 percent commission will be taken from all art sold at this event and donated to Burners without Borders. The Tangent Gallery is located at 715 Milwaukee Ave., Detroit; 313-873-2955; tangentgallery.com.

    The post Tangent Gallery to host Breaking Borders appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • 48 to film — behind the scenes at the 48 Hour Film Project

    By Amanda Mooney There’s a lot that goes into producing a film, and unless you are a filmmaker you really have no idea. Writing, casting, finding a location, shooting, and editing; each step of the process can take days, months, and sometimes years to complete. Can you imagine doing it ALL in just 48 hours? The 48 Hour Film Project is an annual competition that takes place all over the world in various cities. According to Mike Madigan, head of the Detroit 48 Hour chapter, the city is one of the largest participating in terms of the number of teams. The competing teams go in blind as to what kind of film they will be producing, with no creative planning beyond getting a cast and crew together, Madigan explained. “They pick a genre out of a hat, and they get a line, a prop, and a character. And they have to incorporate that within a short film, that’s usually between 4 to 7 minutes long. And they have the timeframe of doing it all within 48 hours,” said Madigan, “So all the creative process of it all has to happen within that 48 hour–writing a script, putting it together, editing–to […]

    The post 48 to film — behind the scenes at the 48 Hour Film Project appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Passalacqua debut dark project ‘Church: Revival’ at new Hamtramck performance space

    Church: Revival is the new project by local rap duo Passalacqua (aka Bryan Lackner and Brent Smith), but it’s more than just a new Passalacqua release. The rappers teamed up with siblings Jax Anderson (frontwoman of rockers Flint Eastwood) and Seth Anderson, who together form the songwriting team called Syblyng (naturally). The result is a cycle of songs that promises to be darker than Passalacqua’s material so far. The project will make a live debut on Saturday, July 26 at a brand new venue space at the Detroit Bus Co.’s building Eight & Sand, and they will premiere the Right Bros.-directed video for the track “Baptism” as well. Other performances include Tunde Olaniran and Open Mike Eagle, and DJ sets by Nothing Elegant, Dante LaSalle, and Charles Trees. We met up the two duos at Eight & Sand to check out the new space and to talk about the project with all parties involved. Metro Times: How long have you been working together? Jax Anderson: Seth and I are constantly writing songs together. We want to push in the direction of becoming songwriters more frequently. This is our first project that we took on to co-write everything together. We’re basically just a songwriting entity. We won’t play live that […]

    The post Passalacqua debut dark project ‘Church: Revival’ at new Hamtramck performance space appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

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Savage Love

Your Sister’s Keeper

HIV Secrets, gender identity, and same-room sex.

Photo: N/A, License: N/A


Q:

 Two years ago, I found a letter in my sister’s car informing her that the blood she gave during a charity blood drive had tested positive for HIV. I didn’t say anything to her at the time, because it was a really bad time, I wasn’t supposed to find out and I didn’t know what to say.

In the time since, there were a couple of times that it sounded like she came close to telling me, but never did. I worry she never will. She has also recently had some health complications that raise concern about how well she’s taking care of herself and I am concerned she’s missing out on treatment that she should be receiving, fearing that someone in our family might find out. (As an added complication, our family is a bunch of judgmental, religious immigrant types.)

My sister and I have had a complicated relationship growing up and have really only begun to get along in the last few years. In short, our relationship is fragile, but I care for her deeply. I can’t really understand the gravity of having to live with HIV, especially being from such a family as ours, but I wish we could have her diagnosis acknowledged between us so she can know that I’m not going to stop loving her. What should I do?

—Sensitive Issue Surrounds Treating Errant Retroviruses

 

A:

 Your sister may not be facing HIV alone. She could have confided in friends, she could be seeing a great HIV doc, she could be attending a support group. And if your sister were in good health, SISTER, I would encourage you to run with those assumptions, i.e., that she’s getting the help and emotional support she needs. Because it’s generally a good idea to err on the side of respecting a sibling’s right to privacy — even if that respect is retroactive in your case — while also respecting your sister’s specific right to control who she tells about her HIV status.

But it doesn’t sound like your sister is in good health.

While it’s possible she’s facing unrelated health problems that you’ve wrongly attributed to her HIV infection — people with HIV can come down with other shit — that could be a risky assumption.

You wanna show respect for your sister, of course, but you don’t wanna respect your sister to death. If there’s a chance your sister hasn’t sought treatment because she feared it would get back to your family (she’s still on your parents’ health insurance, her physician is a family friend) or because there’s some other issue that prevented her from accessing services for people with HIV (language barriers, cultural barriers), I’m going to urge you to err on the side of speaking up.

Tell your sister what you know and tell her how you found out. If you don’t tell her how you learned about her HIV diagnosis — “How did you know?” “That doesn’t matter!” — your sister will worry that rumors are spreading and that other people already know. So you have to come clean about snooping.

Then tell her you love her, tell her you’re worried for her, and tell her you want to make sure she’s getting both the medical care and the emotional support she needs to stay healthy.

 

Q:

 I’m a youth who identifies as asexual. (That isn’t my question.) I was born female, and I’ve been binding for a while and identify as gender-neutral. But I’m afraid to tell others that I’m gender-neutral for fear of being told I’m wrong because I wear dresses. Does wearing skirts and dresses mean I’m not gender-neutral? I just think I look better in dresses than flannel. —Gender Neutral Asexual Youth

 

A:

 Wear whatever you like, identify however you like and refuse to engage with idiots who think they have a right to critique, dictate or overrule your gender identity.

 

Q:

 I’ve been reading your column for years and that helped me tremendously as my husband’s kinky side began to emerge. We have recently started flirting with the idea of “same-room sex” with other couples. We want a couple to watch us have sex, and we want to watch them have sex, but there would be no physical contact between the couples. But we have had a difficult time finding couples that do not want a soft or full swap. Long story short, I have decided to surprise my husband with a prostitute who will watch and video us but not have contact with either of us. I think he will be thrilled. But I’m wondering if you have any advice on this situation. What are the dos and don’ts? I am totally naive about sex work and sex workers, and I’m also afraid I could get jealous since there would be no other man in the room for me! I should mention that we have had same-room sex with a couple and it went fairly well, but we couldn’t really perform because they kept trying to initiate a swap with us. Help me avoid possible pitfalls! —Monogamous Voyeurs And Exhibitionists

 

A:

 “Surprises are generally unwelcome when it comes to sex, and especially to sex work,” says Siouxsie Q, a Bay Area sex worker as well as the creator and host of the WhoreCast (thewhorecast.com), a weekly podcast about sex work and sex workers. “You think your husband will be thrilled by a surprise prostitute — but what if he is not?”

You’re already worried that you might not be into it: You wanna be watched by a male-female couple, but you’re only thinking about hiring a woman, and that could leave you feeling jealous and left out.

“But if you are going to hire a pro, you might as well get exactly what you want, right?” says Siouxsie. “There are plenty of escorts who do ‘doubles’ with other escorts. Take the time to do the research and find a provider who offers doubles with a male escort or a partner — some providers even specialize in this! Communicate about it with your husband, and instead of putting together an elaborate surprise, embark on a sexual adventure together. The process of looking through ads and picking out people you both find attractive may even be fun.”

Siouxsie recommends booking at least two hours for a session like this — you don’t want to rush through your fantasy, right? — and to respect your sex workers’ quoted rate, i.e., no haggling over their hourly rate.

“When your providers arrive, communicate your boundaries and expectations clearly so everyone is on the same page,” says Siouxsie, “and you and your husband should agree in advance about either of you being able to call a ‘time-out’ mid-session in order to re-establish boundaries or to talk something out. And finally, on a more personal note, this sounds like a really fun session that most providers I know would be really stoked to book! So get out there and make your fantasies come true!”

 

For your Halloween treat, Dan Savage secures sex advice from a mortician, at savagelovecast.com.

Find Dan Savage’s weekly podcast every Tuesday at thestranger.com/savage. Reach him at mail@savagelove.net or @fakedansavage on Twitter.

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We welcome user discussion on our site, under the following guidelines:

To comment you must first create a profile and sign-in with a verified DISQUS account or social network ID. Sign up here.

Comments in violation of the rules will be denied, and repeat violators will be banned. Please help police the community by flagging offensive comments for our moderators to review. By posting a comment, you agree to our full terms and conditions. Click here to read terms and conditions.
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