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  • The Ypsilanti mystery pooper saga continues

    Ypsilanti police are still searching for the person dubbed the “mystery pooper.” Someone has been, as the Associated Press politely puts it today, “soiling slides at an Ypislanti playground over the last six months.” So, of course, someone purchased an electronic billboard along I-94 near Huron St. at exit 183 that delivers multiple calls for action: For instance,”Help us flush the pooper.” The company that purchased the billboard, Adams Outdoor Advertising, knows how to reach the world in the 21st Century, branding each billboard with a hashtag for the public utilize in its efforts: #ypsipooper. WJBK-TV says the billboard also toggles through other rich lines, such as: “Do your civic doody, report the pooper #YPSIPOOPER” “Help us catch the poopetrator #YPSIPOOPER.” You can have the runs, but you can’t hide. They’re still looking for you, Mystery Pooper.

    The post The Ypsilanti mystery pooper saga continues appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • City Slang: DJ AvA, Chuck Flask & Keith Kemp preview Movement at Urban Bean Co.

    It’s a really, very cool idea. Paxahau, the good people behind the Movement Electronic Music Festival, are hosting a series of warm-up events, or previews, to the big festival which takes place Memorial Day weekend. On Thursday evening, Movement moved into the Urban Coffee Bean on Grand River in Detroit. While Dj AvA and Chuck Flask & Keith Kemp ably worked the decks, the regular coffee shop goings on continued behind them. It made for an interesting and amusing webcast experience – one guy was taking a nap on camera, while others supped coffee and tappd their feet. It should come as no surprise – the Urban Coffee Co. people have always been big supporters of electronic music. The place includes a DJ stand, and co-owner Josh Greenwood encourages customers to bring their own vinyl and spin on the open turntables. Not on Thursday night though. This being a coffee shop, and it not being particularly late at night, the music remained pretty chill throughout. DJ AvA (real name Heather McGuigan) includes Beth Orton, Madonna, the B-52’s, Daftpunk and David Byrne among her list of influences, so you know that she’s capable of both whipping up a storm and also […]

    The post City Slang: DJ AvA, Chuck Flask & Keith Kemp preview Movement at Urban Bean Co. appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Here is why landlords could do well in Wayne County

    CNN has a message to all prospective landlords: Head to Wayne County! Occupancy and rental rates are increasing, the report says, creating an opportunity for serious returns on investments. In fact, after comparing the median sales price of homes to average monthly rents in nearly 1,600 counties, RealtyTrac found that Detroit’s Wayne County offers landlords the best return on their investment in the nation. Investors who buy homes in the metro area can expect a 30% gross annual return from rents. That’s triple the national average of 10%. RealtyTrac, an online real estate information company, says the county offers investors low prices for larger homes — with a median price of $45,000. “We’ve got some steals here,” said Rachel Saltmarshall, a real estate agent and immediate past president of the Detroit Association of Realtors, told CNN. “There’s a six-bedroom, 6,000 square-foot home in a historic district selling for $65,000.” For more, read the entire report here.

    The post Here is why landlords could do well in Wayne County appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • The Record Store Day Guide for metro Detroit

    This Saturday, audiophiles across the world will venture out to their favorite independent record stores in search of limited releases that quickly become collectors items. The third Saturday of April marks the fairly new international holiday Record Store Day. There are certainly dos and don’ts to know for RSD — like where to shop, and how to shop. That’s right, there is an etiquette to shopping on Record Store Day and violating that code makes you look like a real asshole. In my experience of celebrating Record Store Day, I’ve seen stores use a few different tactics as far as stocking the special releases. Some establishments will set up a table, somewhere in the store, where a few shoppers at a time can flip through records in a calm and contained manner. Other places will have a similar setup, with all the releases at a table, but shoppers ask the store employees for the releases they want. It’s like a record nerd stock exchange. This process gets loud, slightly confusing and incredibly annoying — this is where elbows start getting thrown. Then, there are places that put the releases on the shelves, usually categorized by size — twelve inches with the twelve inches, seven inches with the seven inches and […]

    The post The Record Store Day Guide for metro Detroit appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • City Slang: DEMF 2014 canceled

    The Detroit Electronic Music Festival, which was supposed to be making a triumphant return this year, has been canceled. A statement on the website says that the festival will be back in 2015. Back in November, Ford Field hosted an announcement party for DEMF, where it was revealed that a new DEMF festival would take place at Campus Martius Park in Detroit over the July 4th weekend. “I’m proud to be involved in the biggest and best electronic music festival in the world,” said Juan Atkins. “The future’s here. This is techno scene.” Not the immediate future, apparently. The DEMF people claim that the M-1 rail construction is partially to blame for the cancellation/12-month-postponement. Read the full statement here. Follow @City_Slang

    The post City Slang: DEMF 2014 canceled appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Metro Times wins heavy at the SPJ Awards

    Despite a turbulent 2013 which saw Metro Times change owners, move buildings and change editors twice, we picked up eight awards at the Society of Professional Journalists Awards on Wednesday night. The big winner was Robert Nixon, design manager, who picked up a first place for “Feature Page Design (Class A)” for our Josh Malerman cover story, first for “Cover Design (Class A)” for our Halloween issue (alongside illustrator John Dunivant), and a second in that same category for our annual Lust issue. In the news categories, our esteemed former news editor and current contributing writer Curt Guyette won third in “General News Reporting” and third in “Best Consumer/Watchdog” – both Class A – for the Fairground Zero and Petcoke Series respectively. Music & Culture Editor Brett Callwood placed third for his Josh Malerman cover story in the “Best Personality Profile (Class A)” category, and former editor Bryan Gottlieb picked up a couple of Class C awards for “Editorial Writing” and “Headline Writing” (third and second, respectively). We were also pleased to learn that our investigative reporter Ryan Felton won first place and an honorable mention for work published while at the Oakland Press. The MT ship is steady now, […]

    The post Metro Times wins heavy at the SPJ Awards appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

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Savage Love

Tragedies Come in Threes

Drunk Boyfriends, Kinky Uncles, and Flowers for Sex Workers

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Q:

 My boyfriend and I have been together for two years and we live together. Recently, his ex was killed in a car accident. They were not on good terms and he often made scathing statements about her. I made the mistake of saying the following several days after her death (after offering him my sympathy on numerous occasions): “I don’t know how to help you grieve in this situation because you didn’t like her.”

Obviously, that was a stupid, careless thing to say. I apologized numerous times and he said that he forgave me. Fast-forward two weeks: We were out having drinks with friends and he disappeared from the bar, refusing to answer my calls.

I ended up calling a cab and heading home by myself. When I got home, he was there drinking with our roommate and some of his friends who were crashing at our house, including his friend’s wife. I was angry and went to bed. I awoke at 8 a.m. alone and went downstairs, where I found him making out with his friend’s wife on our porch; they were both incredibly drunk.

Later, he told me he was still angry about my comment, accused me of hating his ex and informed me that he spent the entire night venting about me to his friends. I am totally capable of getting over one drunken kiss — everybody makes mistakes. However, I feel like the whole context was incredibly toxic and hurtful, especially him airing our dirty laundry to his friends. I’m not sure if I’m interested in staying with someone who can’t speak to me like an adult when he has an issue, and instead gets scary drunk and makes out with people.

Does it seem like our relationship is worth salvaging? We’ve had our ups and downs, but I hope we love each other enough to get past this.

—Confused and Concerned

A:

 Let’s review your boyfriend’s behavior: Gets drunk, ditches girlfriend, gets completely shitfaced back at shared home, bitches about girlfriend to drunk friends, makes out with another woman — who happens to be married to another friend — while his girlfriend sleeps in the next room, gets caught, blames girlfriend.

To me, that looks like someone slamming his hand down on the eject button, i.e., he wants out of this relationship.

Which means your willingness to stay in this relationship — if “this chick” comes through with an apology you feel she owes you, if your boyfriend corrects the record and quits boozing — may be irrelevant.

If your boyfriend wants to dump you but lacks the decency, balls or self-awareness to end it himself (it’s possible that he may not be consciously aware that he wants out), CAC, he’ll keep pulling stunts like this until you’ve had enough and you dump him.

I could be wrong, of course, and I’ve been wrong in the past — see “clitoris, location” and “male bisexuality, existence of” — and this is advice not binding arbitration, blah blah blah.

Maybe his behavior can be attributed to a crazy meltdown reaction to his ex-girlfriend’s death. Clearly, his feelings for his ex were more complicated than he let on. I’m thinking he still had feelings for her, CAC, and I’m betting that she dumped him.

He may have said only shitty things to you about his ex because he thought that’s what you wanted to hear. Reminding him about all of the shit he talked about his ex may have made him angry with himself and he projected that anger onto you, and now, in the cold/sober light of day, he’ll be able to see that and he’ll apologize and you can rebuild your relationship.

Or, you know, not.

Q:

 My uncle died in a car wreck. I didn’t know him well, but we lived in the same city and he named me executor of his estate. He was single, childless, straight, unmarried, and — as it turns out — pretty kinky. I’ve been looking around online and some of this stuff in his “playroom” is worth a lot of money. But you can’t haul a $1,000 bondage table out on the lawn for a yard sale (at least not where he lived). So what do you do with a dungeon full of BDSM gear when the owner dies unexpectedly?

—Boy De-acquisitioning Sadistic Merch

A:

 There’s an adult section on eBay where you can unload the stuff, BDSM, and NaughtyBids.com is a site dedicated to auctioning off pre-owned sex toys and gear. But if you don’t want to do the work (and you don’t care about cashing in on that bondage table), Google around a bit and I bet you’ll find a local BDSM group in your area that would be happy take your late uncle’s gear off your hands.

Q:

 I’m a gay man in a happy and open marriage. I routinely seek the services of an erotic masseur, a man with whom I have a great client/service-provider relationship. I found out when booking my next massage with him that he was recently in a car accident with his long-term partner, who died in the hospital. Normally, I’d send flowers and a card. However, due to the nature of our working relationship, I don’t want to extend myself in ways that could be uncomfortable for him. I wouldn’t want to put him in the position of having to explain who I am if the card I sent was read by someone else. Any advice would be appreciated.

—Wants To Be Respectful

A: He’s a sex worker, WTBR, not a moron.

Backing up: If we were talking about your lawyer, hairstylist or housekeeper — anyone else with whom you had a client/service-provider relationship — you wouldn’t hesitate to send flowers and a card. The only reason you’re hesitating in this case is because you fear outing your masseur as a sex worker. And here’s what’s fucked up about that: You’re assuming that he isn’t already out about doing sex work. You’re assuming that being outed as a sex worker is the worst possible thing that could happen to him (I think your masseur can attest that there are worse things).

Most shockingly — you’re assuming that your masseur is too stupid to cover for himself if he isn’t out about doing sex work and if someone else reads your card and if that person asks who you are.

Trust me, should a nosy relative ask him who you are — which is highly unlikely — your masseur has lots of options before he gets around to “a decent and kind guy I sometimes jack off for money.” He can say you’re a friend or an acquaintance or someone with whom he’s worked.

Sex workers are subjected to far too much of that by people who don’t see them as fully human. Don’t participate in the dehumanization of sex workers. Send the flowers. 

The new magnum Savage Lovecast season starts on Oct. 22 at savagelovecast.com.

Find Dan Savage’s weekly podcast every Tuesday at thestranger.com/savage. Reach him at mail@savagelove.net or @fakedansavage on Twitter.

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We welcome user discussion on our site, under the following guidelines:

To comment you must first create a profile and sign-in with a verified DISQUS account or social network ID. Sign up here.

Comments in violation of the rules will be denied, and repeat violators will be banned. Please help police the community by flagging offensive comments for our moderators to review. By posting a comment, you agree to our full terms and conditions. Click here to read terms and conditions.
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