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  • Thank you, Detroit

    I’m not going to lie to you – this isn’t easy. This week, the final City Slang local music column will be published in the Metro Times (on hardcore band Final Assault), and I have just submitted a cover feature on the women of Detroit hip-hop, to be published next week (8/6). This blog that you’re reading now will be my last one as a regular MT contributor. I have a lot to look forward to. I’m going to be an associate editor at Yellow Scene Magazine in Colorado, a tremendous publication in a beautiful part of the country. But leaving Detroit will be incredibly difficult for me. I love the place. It’s been (amazingly) six and a half years since I arrived, a couple of cases in hand and not much of a plan in mind. I just knew, after three separate research trips for books and a magazine article, that I felt at home here. Metro Times offered me freelance work almost immediately, as did a new website called Metromix (whatever happened to that?) When I arrived here, I had been working as a writer in the UK for nine years, but the help and encouragement I received […]

    The post Thank you, Detroit appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Christmas in July, Jack White, and the Tigers

      We here at MT will be delighted when Mr. Jack White throws out a pitch at Navin Field (at least, we hope he will), but until then, we’ll be happy with his pitch to Santa this evening at Comerica Park.    

    The post Christmas in July, Jack White, and the Tigers appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Watch footage of the Gathering of the Juggalos dubbed with Morgan Freeman narration (NSFW)

      Footage from the Gathering of the Juggalos set to clips of Morgan Freeman’s narration from March of the Penguins? Kind of forced, but also kind of beautiful. As the AV Club reports: The oft-sought voiceover champion lends a touch of gravitas to the festival proceedings. Unfortunate scenes of barely clad people having various liquids dumped onto them now carries a quiet dignity as it’s all part of nature’s majestic plan that keeps the world spinning through this elegantly designed and truly wondrous universe. Also, the video is NSFW as there are boobs in it. Watch the clip below:

    The post Watch footage of the Gathering of the Juggalos dubbed with Morgan Freeman narration (NSFW) appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Turn to Crime debut chilly video for “Can’t Love”

    It seems like the polar vortex will never end: the weather phenomenon that brought us the most brutal winter on record this winter is to blame for this summer’s chillier-than usual temperatures as well. A couple of bands, though, made lemonade out of lemons (or snow cones out of snow?) by using the icy landscape to film music videos. 800beloved shot the video for “Tidal” in some sand dunes near Empire, Mich., and this week Turn to Crime debuted the video for “Can’t Stop,” the title track of their recently-released album. Even more piles of ice and snow might be the last thing Detroiters want to see right now, but the footage makes for some good visuals that mesh well with the song. Watch the video below:

    The post Turn to Crime debut chilly video for “Can’t Love” appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Duggan takes control of Detroit water department; says changes to approach on ‘delinquent payment issues’ needed

    Detroit Emergency Manager Kevyn Orr transferred oversight of the the city’s water department Tuesday to Detroit Mayor Mike Duggan in an order intended to refocus “efforts to help DWSD customers get and remain current on their water bills,” Orr’s office said today. “This order provides additional clarity to the powers already delegated to the mayor,” Orr said in a statement released Tuesday. “As the Detroit Water and Sewerage Department works to operate more efficiently and communicate more effectively with customers, it is important to ensure there are clear lines of management and accountability.” Duggan will have the authority to manage DWSD and make appointments to the utility’s board, according to a news release. In a statement issued Tuesday, the mayor said he welcomed Orr’s order, adding that officials will develop a plan that “allows those who truly need to access to financial help … to do so with shorter wait times.” “We need to change a number of things in the way we have approached the delinquent payment issues and I expect us to have a new plan shortly,” Duggan said. “There are funds available to support those who cannot afford their bills — we need to do a much better job in […]

    The post Duggan takes control of Detroit water department; says changes to approach on ‘delinquent payment issues’ needed appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Rovers Scooter Club Celebrates 10 Years

    Rovers Scooter Club, a local gang dedicated to celebrating and riding motor scooters, will be celebrating its 10 year anniversary this week with a very special ride. Motor City Shakedown, the annual birthday party for the club, will commence this Friday, August 1 at New Way Bar. DJ Grover from Cincinnati will be spinning northern soul, reggae, and ska, according to club member Michael Palazzola. Saturday will feature a ride from Ferndale to Detroit, starting at noon at M-Brew. Palazzola says this is where most bikes will congregate before taking the ride to the city and folks will be prepping by getting some grub starting at 10 a.m.  Detroit’s Tangent Gallery will host the after party,  a special event that will feature performances by several bands as well as Satori Circus. That portion of the event will commence at 8 p.m. with performances starting at 9 p.m. It’s free to riders, but the public is welcome to join the party with the mere cost of a door charge. Come midnight, the club will raffle off a vintage Lambretta LI 150. Sunday morning will end the weekend of festivities, with brunch taking place at the Bosco in Ferndale.   

    The post Rovers Scooter Club Celebrates 10 Years appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

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Savage Love

Toilet talk

Poop-gasms? Spooch? This and more in a particularly graphic edition of Savage Love.

Photo: Courtesy Photo, License: N/A

Courtesy Photo


Q: Straight female with a question. It’s about something that sometimes happens to me that I’ve never really told anyone about because it’s so weird and gross. It involves my bowel movements, so it’s not very sexy. (No offense to scat lovers, but I have zero interest in “poop play.”) After I have a normal bowel movement, I pull up my jeans. When I do that, the crotch seam presses on my clit as I begin to close the zipper, and I get what I can only describe as an intense mini-orgasm. This is directly related to the recent BM because it happens only after one. I find myself just standing there in the bathroom, holding my pants up with my hands frozen on the zipper, eyes half-closed, gently pressing my jeans into my crotch while my clit just hammers out an unsolicited series of intense orgasmic spasms. It’s not really a full-on climax, rather just a dozen or so fast and strong fluttering contractions of pleasure right in my clitoral area. I find myself enjoying these post-poop-gasms when they happen, although it’s something I’ve kept to myself for obvious reasons. I am not complaining. I am merely curious to know if you’ve ever heard of this and if you know why and how it happens. Do other people have similar experiences? —Possibly Odd Or Perhaps Curious Orgasm Mostly Enjoyed Regularly

A: I shared your letter with Dr. Debby Herbenick, a research scientist at Indiana University, a sexual health educator at the Kinsey Institute, and the author of Great in Bed and numerous books about sexuality.

Dr. Herbenick’s short answer: “Genitals are magical, mysterious places of wonder.”

And her much more satisfying long answer: “There are other documented cases of people having orgasms while pooping. Most are on Internet message boards, but some have made it into the medical and scientific literature. ‘Defecation-induced orgasms’ seem to be more common than orgasms from peeing, but both kinds happen.”

Yes, yes: But why and how do defecation-induced orgasms happen?

“It’s not entirely clear, but here are some possibilities,” says Dr. Herbenick. “The pelvic nerve — which is one orgasmic pathway — links up to not only the vagina and cervix, but also the rectum and bladder. Another possibility is something called nerve ‘crosstalk.’ In essence, the genital and excretory parts are smooshed closely together, and some nerves (like the pelvic nerve) service more than one part. Thus, feelings and messages carried in the nerves can get a little muddled. For example, some people can have vaginal pain from bladder problems. Similarly, people describe genital orgasms from stimulation of nearby parts, and nerve crosstalk is thought to be part of that.” (Want to shut up an “intelligent design” creationist? Ask them to defend the ill-advised, none-too-intelligent smooshing together of our excretory and reproductive systems — after making them Google “obstetric fistula.”)

“POOPCOMER doesn’t have to like the fact that she orgasms from pooping,” says Dr. Herbenick, “but it’s better than the opposite scenario: unintentionally pooping during orgasm. That also happens.”

Follow Dr. Herbenick on Twitter @DebbyHerbenick.

Q: You always take questions from BDSMers and cuckolds and other hardcore sexers, but will you take mine? I plead with you! Won’t you please offer some advice for me, a simple heterosexual girl having problems with her heterosexual male?!? My boyfriend always closes and locks the door behind him when he pees. It hurts my feelings! Being a part of his pissing experience would turn me on and arouse me! He claims he does this because he is pee-shy. But he pees in public restrooms in front of other men! So if he knows that I like it, and if the issue isn’t about being pee-shy, then why can’t he pee in front of me?!? Why is he “NO GIRLS ALLOWED” about this?!? I would be grateful for your advice on how to get him to relax with his peeing moments a little more because I’m bored. Thanks! —Personally Insulted Since Sexy Entrance Denied

A: You’re just a simple heterosexual girl who wants to be part of her boyfriend’s “pissing experience” because that would turn you on — nothing kinky or hardcore about that, no sir. You’re just after some old-fashioned, all-American, plain-vanilla voyeuristic piss play.

I’m not sure there’s anything I could say here that would persuade your boyfriend to include you in his pissing experience. If knowing that it would make his piss-freak girlfriend insanely horny doesn’t motivate a guy to unlock the door and let her watch, PISSED, he’s unlikely to be convinced by some gay dude with an advice column. (But just in case: Hey, PISSED’s BF! Open the damn door!) So if watching your boyfriend piss is really that important to you, PISSED, you’ll have to get a new boyfriend or start following the one you’ve got into public restrooms.

Q: Longtime reader, first-time letter writer. My 13-year-old stepson leaves his spooch on the goddamn toilet seat. How do I tell him to clean up after himself? I don’t know how he gets it on the toilet seat! Logistically, it baffles me! —Step-Parent Ain’t Not Kleaning Spooch

A: That word you keep using — spooch — I don’t think it means what you think it means. Spooch is not slang for ejaculate, SPANKS, but it could be the world’s worst name for a dog. No, no, no: The word you want is spooge. And I don’t think your sign-off means what you think it means, either. Putting a “not” after that ungrammatical “ain’t” means you’re anxious to clean your stepson’s spooge off that goddamn toilet seat.

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