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    The Metro Times is looking to hear your experiences will sexual assault on a Michigan college campus — from anything to how many sexual assault prevention programs, rape kits or crisis centers you may have had access to, to how the administration or local law enforcement handled your experience. If you, or anyone you know might be interested in talking to a reporter at the Metro Times, please email us at college@metrotimes.com.

    The post Metro Times seeking stories of college sexual assault appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Get ready for National Tequila Day!

    Thursday, July 24th marks National Tequila Day, and forget everything you know about the beverage. Those nasty old “tequilas” of yesterday were find for doing body shots, but tequila has become something of a luxury spirit while few were paying attention. Have you tried all the varieties of tequila? Can you tell the difference between blanco, joven, reposed, añejo and extra añejo?  If your local bar doesn’t have the stuff that will help you celebrate this important holiday, there are several bars that cater just to the tequila fan. There’s Aqua Rum and Tequila Bar in the MGM Grand Detroit Casino in Detroit, as well as Rojo Mexican Bistro in Novi, which offers more than 100 kinds of tequila, and Taqo Detroit, a new spot serving American-friendly Mexican fare and serving an astonishing variety of tequilas, more than 200 in all. Been waiting for a reason to drink up this south-of-the-border nectar? You got it. Guzzle responsibly.    

    The post Get ready for National Tequila Day! appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • DWSD to host water fair in wake of 15 day moratorium on Detroit water shutoffs

    In light of worldwide attention on its efforts to cut water service for thousands of Detroit residents, the Detroit Water & Sewerage Department said today it would host a Water Affordability Fair on August 2nd to explain options available to those facing financial hardship. DWSD officials said in a news release today the fair will be take place from 8:30 a.m. to 5 p.m. at the department’s Eastside Customer Service Center at 13303 E. McNichols. The move came on the heels of growing pressure from opponents of the initiative and criticism from the U.S. bankruptcy judge overseeing Detroit’s Chapter 9 case. “Every customer that has come to DWSD with a legitimate financial hardship has not had their water service terminated,” said Darryl Latimer, DWSD deputy director, in a statement. “In cases where the water has been shut off, it’s been restored. We keep hearing at DWSD that there are poor people who are not receiving the assistance that they need, so we want to help them and we want to make it as easy as possible for the to receive that help. That’s why we created the Water Affordability Fair – ease of access and ease of assistance. We are here to […]

    The post DWSD to host water fair in wake of 15 day moratorium on Detroit water shutoffs appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Thrillist Names Detroit’s Motz’s Burgers Among Best in Nation

    The folks at Thrillist have again compiled their annual list of the nation’s best burgers, and Southeast Michigan, it seems, is well represented. Ranking alongside joints in major cities such as New York and L.A., is Detroit’s own Motz’s Burgers, hailed specifically for its Double Cheeseburger Slider. Via Thrillist: There’s nothing remarkable about the façade of this SW diner… it’s just a diner, like the hundreds of others in the D. The staff’s been there for years… and so have the regulars, who can’t get enough of Motz’s legendary smashed burgers. The formula’s nothing revolutionary: smashed, griddled patties with oozy cheese and onions that melt into the burger itself as it cooks. But it’s that unmistakable flavor of a well-seasoned griddle — which has also been here for years — that makes the difference. You can score big burgers with accoutrements, but this isn’t really a place to say things like “accoutrements”. Grab the old-school slider (the double cheeseburger one), and prepare for three perfect bites of Detroit’s finest. Flint’s Torch Bar and Grill also made the cut, most notably for its Deluxe Torch Burger with Bacon. Tucked away in an alley beyond the brick streets that used to mark […]

    The post Thrillist Names Detroit’s Motz’s Burgers Among Best in Nation appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • In what weird ways are you paying for school? MT wants to know!

    The Metro Times is looking for college students or graduates of Michigan colleges that used atypical means to pay for their schooling (i.e. sugar baby, selling underwear, military enrollment purely for school help, etc.). We are looking for personal anecdotes about the lengths you went to help pay for school, what came of it, your monetary situation, if the resource worked to get you through college and more. If you have utilized any one of these avenues, or know someone who has, please drop us a line at college@metrotimes.com.

    The post In what weird ways are you paying for school? MT wants to know! appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Kid Rock ordered to produce dildo in ICP sexual harassment lawsuit

    File under “WTF” — attorneys representing former Psychopathic Records publicist Andrea Pellegrini announced Monday that they have subpoenaed Kid Rock to produce a glass dildo as part of Pellegrini’s sexual harassment lawsuit against the Insane Clown Posse’s record label. Pellegrini claims the glass dildo was given to her by Psychopathic Records employee “Dirty Dan” Diamond as part of a larger culture of constant harassment in which she was called “bitch,” made the target of explicit sexual advances by Diamond and other co-workers, asked to procure automatic weapons for a photo shoot, and even encouraged to “deceive government investigators from the US Department of Labor.” On Friday, Diamond admitted under oath that he told Pellegrini that he had “a fat cock” and that he would “fuck the shit out of her.” The dildo, though, was “a work of art,” according to Diamond, and should not be considered sexual harassment. Why is Kid Rock involved? Diamond says when Pellegrini declined his dildo, he gave it to Kid Rock instead (presumably as a “work of art” and not a sexual advance). So now, according to court orders, Rock has 14 days to produce the glass dildo so the court can better determine if it is art or, well, a dildo. We will […]

    The post Kid Rock ordered to produce dildo in ICP sexual harassment lawsuit appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

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Savage Love

She’s Pulled Up Stakes

Get the fuck away from each other, Don’t ask, don’t tell

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Q:

 I am a 23-year-old straight male. My ex-girlfriend and I started dating in high school when we were both 17, and continued dating until I broke up with her the summer after our freshman year in college because things felt too serious.

We continued to have sex, but I blocked out all my feelings for her — even though she was open about still wanting to be with me. She started dating someone else sophomore year; I then realized I still wanted to be with her, and I broke down emotionally and made both our lives difficult while she was dating this new guy. I was a very unattractive person then. I also found out other details by snooping. I know that during the time we dated, she faked orgasms with me. She didn’t have one with me until she introduced a vibrator into the relationship — the year we were having emotionless sex after the breakup. This made me feel inadequate. Since then, we have forgiven each other and tried several times to rekindle our romantic relationship. Unfortunately, while for me there is a sexual attraction, she says she is no longer attracted to me. I’m sensitive, fashionable and artistic, and she tells me she’s more attracted to the “all-American-man” type. She is currently dating someone long-distance, and they have been together for seven months. But we still talk about “us,” we still cuddle, and she’ll say things like “When I think of growing old, I imagine doing so with you.” She views our intimacy as “friendly,” while I view it as more romantic. I try to be a good friend, but hearing emotional crap about her relationship makes me want to scream, “WTF are you doing? No guy will ever clear your bar, because I set the bar!” Do you think there is any chance that we will be together again? Am I nuts to still want this girl?

— Her Ideal Mate

 

A:

 There are six other continents on this planet — six in addition to the one your ex-girlfriend currently resides on — and my advice for you, HIM, is to pick any other continent and move there. Get. The. Fuck. Away. From. Her.

Not because your ex is evil, HIM, but because this relationship is over. She’s not only seeing someone else, she’s made it clear that you’re not her type. She’s not into sensitive, fashionable and artistic types — she may not be into entitled assholes, either — and it’s time to take the hint that she’s practically pegging you with. And I gotta say … This relationship is never going to be what it was, because neither of you is ever going to be what you were — that is, you’re never going to be 17 and in love for the very first time again. The bar you’re talking about, HIM? Hormones set it, you didn’t.

P.S.: It sounds like you behaved terribly after you dumped your ex. When you wrote, “I made both our lives difficult,” I read, “I stalked my ex.” (Snooping after a breakup? That’s a stalker move.) And having “emotionless sex” with someone who has “blocked out all [his] feelings” for you — being treated like a fleshlight by someone you still have feelings for — is rarely a pleasant experience, HIM. It must’ve been particularly painful for your ex, back when she still wanted to get back together with your arty-farty ass. So, perhaps she’s treating you this way — keeping you on call for cuddles, dropping hints about getting back together (in old age!), dumping “emotional crap” on you about her current boyfriend — in a subconscious effort to get revenge. You tormented her then; she’s tormenting you now. But whatever her deal is, the bottom line is this: When two people aren’t good to each other, when they’re not good for each other, they should get the fuck away from each other.

 

Q:

 My husband and I are both in our mid-20s. He’s in the military and our relationship, though imperfect, is strong; we’re both happy with — and good to — each other. Not long ago, we decided that a “monogamish” arrangement appealed to us both and we renegotiated the terms of our relationship. He recently got orders for a yearlong deployment, and one of the many things we need to do before he leaves, I think, is have another conversation about nonmonogamy.

I think we should adopt a “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy. I doubt I could tolerate the inevitable stress of this upcoming year if I were expected to abstain from sex for the duration. But it’s unlikely that either of us would want to hear about the other’s casual hookups when we’re separated by nine time zones. Yet I can’t bring myself to speak up, because I’m already so jealous of the people he might fuck while I’m on the opposite side of the world and unable to fuck him myself. Suddenly, the thought of my husband with someone else is nearly intolerable. What would you do in this situation?

— Worried I Fear Estrangement

 

A:

 If my husband were about to deploy to a war zone, I would probably do what you’re doing, WIFE: I would worry about sex — I would worry about the people who might want to fuck my deployed husband — because that would provoke less anxiety than worrying about the people who might want to harm my deployed husband. Talk to your husband, WIFE, and put that “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy on the table. Considering that you’ll most likely have more opportunities than he will over the next 12 months, a DADT policy may be precisely what your husband wants while he’s deployed. And share your feelings of jealousy with him. Those feelings are not only normal and natural, WIFE, they’re a good sign. It would be more worrisome if you didn’t care who he fucked and he didn’t care who you fucked. And your husband may share your chief concern: It’s one thing to think about your partner fucking someone else when you’re around (and you’re able to fuck your partner, too, and remind your partner why he’s with you), and it’s quite another thing to think about your partner fucking someone else when you’re not around. Feelings of jealousy and insecurity can make a person feel like she’s not cut out for a monogamish relationship. But it’s working through those inevitable feelings of jealousy and insecurity — with your partner, not your sex-advice columnist — that proves you are cut out for one. Good luck, WIFE, and I hope your husband comes home safe and sound.

 

Find Dan Savage’s weekly podcast every Tuesday at thestranger.com/savage. Reach him at mail@savagelove.net or @fakedansavage on Twitter.

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