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  • Once-controversial Diego Rivera murals now national landmark

    Oh, the irony — initially criticized as Marxist propaganda when Mexican muralist Diego Rivera painted them for the Detroit Institute of Arts in the early 1930s, Detroit Industry has now been designated as a a national landmark. The announcement was made Wednesday, according to the Detroit News by U.S. Secretary of the Interior Sally Jewell and National Park Service Director Jonathan B. Jarvis as part of National Park Week. The designation does not change the ownership status of the murals or grant any new protections or rights, leaving its place among the rest of the DIA’s art in possible bankruptcy negotiations in question. The work is considered the best of Rivera’s work in the United States (another mural Rivera had done in New York was destroyed by orders of Nelson Rockefeller). Rivera himself regarded Detroit Industries paintings as his finest work. In the midst of the McCarthy era, the DIA posted this sign outside the court: Rivera’s politics and his publicity seeking are detestable. But let’s get the record straight on what he did here. He came from Mexico to Detroit, thought our mass production industries and our technology wonderful and very exciting, painted them as one of the great achievements of the twentieth century. This came […]

    The post Once-controversial Diego Rivera murals now national landmark appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Detroit area code 313 may be phased out

    Hey, everybody from the 313, start thinking of new numbers to rally around– the longstanding Detroit area code may be phased out. Our friends over at the Detroit News report that pending a revised estimate next week, the North American Numbering Plan Administration will stop handing out 313 telephone prefixes on new phone numbers. Detroiters with existing cell phone lines would be able to keep their current area codes, while those with land lines would change. via Detroit News: The venerable 313 will ultimately become overtaxed. Even as Detroit’s population has fallen, cellphone usage has accelerated like one of those smoldering SRT Vipers that Dodge has been bolting together at Conner Avenue Assembly — which is, of course, comfortably within the confines of 313. … When the first five dozen area codes were assigned nearly 70 years ago, says NANPA’s Tom Foley, “that was expected basically to last forever.” Instead, somebody invented fax machines, and then somebody else came up with cellphones, and lots of somebody elses decided to give them to 10-year-olds, and meantime the population grew to 300 million. Now every telephone carrier is required to submit twice-yearly forecasts of its needs in each area code, factoring in […]

    The post Detroit area code 313 may be phased out appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Final members selected for Red Wings arena Neighborhood Advisory Council

    Unfortunately, we were unable to attend last night’s Neighborhood Advisory Council, which, in case you were unaware, is a 16-member board established to weigh in on the new Red Wings arena near downtown. About three dozen residents and property owners cast ballots by the 8 p.m. deadline on Wednesday inside the Block at Cass Park, The Detroit News reports. It’s the culmination of a handful of community meetings which began weeks ago. Councilwoman Raquel Castaneda Lopez facilitated the meetings, but emphasized at previous meetings that it’s up to the community to conduct business. According to the News, the 12 candidates selected include: Michael Boettcher, Richard Etue, Jason Gapa, Francis Grunow, Steve Guether, Paul Hughes, Ray Litt, Warner Doyle McBryde, Karen McLeod, Delphia Simmons, Melissa Thomas and Anthony Zander. Joel Landy, a land owner in the area, lost his bid. The City Council appointed four candidates last month. As we reported in this week’s issue, the Neighborhood Advisory Committee was negotiated after Olympia Development of Michigan, Detroit Red Wing’s owner Mike Ilitch’s real estate arm, balked on a proposed community benefits agreement.  The committee is charged with the task of offering input on the arena’s design, parking security and more.

    The post Final members selected for Red Wings arena Neighborhood Advisory Council appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • James McMurtry and The Bottle Rockets coming to the Magic Bag

    The Magic Bag in Ferndale will host James McMurtry and The Bottle Rockets on Thursday, May 28, at 8 p.m. Tickets are $20. A press release reads, “James McMurtry recently signed with the bourgeoning Los Angeles record label Complicated Game. The legendary songwriter will enter the studio later this month to start working on his first album in six years. “I’ve got a new batch of songs, organic and with no added sulfites, aged in oak for several years,” he says. “Francois Moret at Complicated Game seems to like these songs and (producer) C.C. Adcock thinks he can turn them into a record. Good times fixing to roll.” Label head Moret agrees. “In March 2013, when C.C. Adcock told me we were going to see James McMurtry at the Continental Club in Austin, I expected to see a good show,” he says, “but what I saw left me mesmerized! I immediately knew I wanted to sign him. As a European, it is an amazing opportunity to work with one of the most talented American singer-songwriters.” Evidence: McMurtry’s Just Us Kids (2008) and Childish Things (2005). The former earned his highest Billboard 200 chart position in nearly two decades and notched […]

    The post James McMurtry and The Bottle Rockets coming to the Magic Bag appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • City Slang: Dead Kennedys to have a holiday in Detroit

    The Dead Kennedys, still with local boy Klaus Flouride in the ranks, will play St. Andrew’s Hall on Tuesday, June 24. Alongside Flouride and fellow original members East Bay Ray and DH Peligro, the current lineup includes singer Ron “Skip” Greer, taking the place of Jello Biafra. Downtown Brown will open that show, which starts at 7 p.m., with tickets priced $20-$25. Give Klaus a hero’s hometown welcome. Just over a week before that, strangely enough, Jello Biafra & the Guantanamo School of Medicine will play at the Magic Stick. It’s a weird coincidence, but one that DK fans should be happy to embrace. That show starts at 8 p.m. and tickets are $17-$19. Local hardcore vets Negative Approach play before Jello, with the Crashdollz opening the show. Follow @City_Slang

    The post City Slang: Dead Kennedys to have a holiday in Detroit appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Planet Ant presents A Steady Rain

    The Planet Ant Theatre in Hamtramck will present a police drama called A Steady Rain May 2 through 24. Planet Ant veterans Ryan Carlson and York Griffith will star in the play, written by House of Cards and Mad Men co-writer Keith Huff. Tickets ($10-$20) are on sale now at PlanetAnt.com. According to the press release, “A Steady Rain by Keith Huff focuses on Joey and Denny, best friends since kindergarten and partners on the police force whose loyalty to each other is tested by domestic affairs, violence and the rough streets of Chicago. Joey helps Denny with his family and Denny helps Joey stay off the bottle. But when a routine disturbance call takes a turn for the worse their loyalty is put to the ultimate test.First produced at Chicago Dramatists, A Steady Rain appeared on Broadway featuring Hugh Jackman and Daniel Craig. The Planet Ant production of A Steady Rain is directed by York Griffith featuring Ryan Carlson and Andy Huff. This marks the return of two of Planet Ant’s founding members. Carlson and Griffith. Griffith has served as the theatre’s Artistic Director where he directed the critically-acclaimed productions The Adding Machine and Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? […]

    The post Planet Ant presents A Steady Rain appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

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Savage

She's a Downer

Depression, one night stands, and adult babies.

Photo: N/A, License: N/A


 

Q: I recently ended a relationship that lasted a year and five months. While I loved this woman, for much of the relationship she was, to varying degrees, depressed. I tried to be as helpful and patient as possible with the hope and expectation that she would get better. We went to couples counseling together. She got on medication. I encouraged her to eat well (I cooked her many healthy meals) and exercise daily (which she was never able to do). I tried to get her out into nature. I tried to listen and practice strong communication skills. I encouraged her to explore the benefits of a fulfilling and GGG relationship, but our sex life faltered because of the depression and her low libido. I kept helping and waiting, but she was simply unable to assert herself to make healthy changes (both physical and mental). I felt trapped dating someone who couldn’t take control of her life, and the patterns kept repeating. I eventually ended the relationship, which was the right decision for me, but she was crushed. I’m hoping we can be friends in the future. Do you have any advice for dating someone with depression? Can relationships and depression work? I found it to be soul-crushing. 
—Serious About Depression
 
A: “I think SAD did the right thing,” said Rob Delaney, the comedian, Twitter supernova, and author of the new book Rob Delaney: Mother. Wife. Sister. Human. Warrior. Falcon. Yardstick. Turban. Cabbage. “And not only ‘the’ right thing, but a series of right things.”
 
Delaney’s book is a collection of personal essays — most of them hilarious — in which he writes about his own struggle with depression so crippling, it almost took his life. Delaney is now the official spokesperson for all people everywhere who struggle with depression.

“This guy went above and beyond, motivated by his obvious love for this woman and his decency as a person,” Delaney continued. “One might ‘suck it up’ for a bit longer if there are kids involved or if you’ve been together for years and years and this depressive state is an anomaly, but this guy can’t be expected to weld himself to someone he’s been dating for less than a year-and-a-half when there are people out there he’d truly enjoy himself with.”

Delaney not only felt that you had done right by this woman, but that your actions could serve as a template for other readers dating people struggling with depression.

“SAD was kind, patient and proactive, and when that didn’t work, he ended the relationship,” said Delaney. “He didn’t assume that she would implode without him around. He seems to have a manageable enough ego to realize that he’s not the sun and the air and the only doorway through which this woman can walk to happiness; he’s merely another human being (albeit a kind one) whose happiness has value too. And maybe this breakup will provide the jolt she needs to recalibrate her approach to her depression and really get better. He also showed her another person taking care of himself. I sincerely hope she develops this skill herself, but as anyone who’s been around for a while and witnessed trouble and had troubles of their own knows, you cannot will that behavior into people. That does not mean you don’t love them.”

Not following @RobDelaney on 
Twitter? You’re the only one. Go to 
robdelaney.com to buy his new book.
 
Q: Setting sexually transmitted infections aside, is it safer for a woman planning to have a one-night stand to take the guy back to her place or to go to his place? Does this apply if both are staying in hotels?
—Reader Is Seeking Knowledge
 
A: When you’re having sex with a stranger, RISK, it’s generally considered safer — some would argue only marginally so — to go back to his place. The reason for this is kinda depressing: A stranger is less likely to murder you at his place because then he has to dispose of your body, which is apparently a real pain in the ass. But if he murders you at your place, RISK, he can jet in the morning and stick your landlord and loved ones with disposal duties.
 
Q: I’m a 21-year-old gay male who loves listening to the Savage Lovecast as I bike to school. My question: Can someone grow out of or “quit” a fetish? For me, I’m an ABDL, which stands for “adult baby/diaper lover.” I get turned on by putting other guys into diapers or having other, usually older, guys put me in diapers. I can have normal sex and have had a few decent relationships, or at least as decent as most gay guys still in college have, with guys I’ve met through kink sites like Fetlife or through the normal means of meeting guys. I’ve met a great guy who has helped me mix ABDL with bondage for some REAL fun, and I’m pretty OK with knowing that there’s nothing particularly wrong with having a kink like mine. I had a perfectly normal childhood, and it’s not like I suffered a diaper-related trauma or something. Unfortunately, this particular fetish creeps most people out and is closely associated with pedophilia, even though members of the ABDL community have no interest in kids. However, the idea of being into this kink when I’m in my 40s really grosses me out. I’ve gone through the binge-and-purge cycle most guys go through when they realize they’re into diapers. But is there any way to retrain your brain to not get off on a particular fetish? 
—Another Boy Diaper Lover
 
 A: The consensus in the sex-and-science research crowd is this: Your kinks will always be your kinks — a brain cannot be retrained where kinks are concerned — so you might as well enjoy your kinks. But that’s only if your kinks can be enjoyed consensually, ABDL, which yours happily can be. And while it’s true that some people have taken drugs to “treat” disturbing kinks, these drugs — mostly SSRIs — suppress libido generally; they do not target (nor can they eradicate) one kink in particular. (Are you willing to give up sex to get over diapers? I didn’t think so.)
 
That said, ABDL, kinks have certain narratives — kinks have broad themes — and figuring out your kink’s narratives may help you tap into and enjoy other kinks with similar N’s and T’s but lower creep factors. If what you enjoy about diapers is the helplessness and loss of control they symbolize, mixed with your submission to an affectionate and caring authority figure, you might find fetish puppy play similarly arousing, ABDL. That kink also has themes of helplessness, dependence and affection. And while most people don’t find fucking a person who is pretending to be a baby dog any less creepy than fucking a person who’s pretending to be a baby baby, there seem to be a lot more puppy players out there than diaper fans.

But honestly, ABDL, I think you should keep looking for a guy who’s into the same things you are. If for some reason you can’t date the great guy who helped you mix diaper play with bondage, you should take his existence as proof that there are other guys like him, i.e., guys who will like you and like what you like.

Find Dan Savage’s weekly podcast every Tuesday at thestranger.com/savage. Reach him at mail@savagelove.net or @fakedansavage on Twitter.

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