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  • Lily Tomlin coming to Ann Arbor

    Detroit home-girl Lily Tomlin will perform at the Hill Auditorium in Ann Arbor on Saturday, June 14. A press release reads, “Get together with Lily Tomlin for an unforgettable night of fun and sidesplitting laughter. “Tomlin is amazing” The NY Times and “as always a revelation.” The New Yorker This unique comic artist takes her audience on what the Washington Post calls a “wise and howlingly funny” trip with more than a dozen of her timeless characters—from Ernestine to Mrs. Beasley to Edith Ann.” “With astounding skill and energy, Tomlin zaps through the channels like a human remote control. Using a fantastic range of voices, gestures and movements, she conjures up the cast of characters with all the apparent ease of a magician pulling a whole menagerie of animals from a single hat.” NY Daily News “Her gentle touch is as comforting as it is edifying.” NY Time Out She has “made the one-person show the daring, irreverent art form it is today.” Newsweek Her long list of awards includes: a Grammy; two Tonys; six Emmys; an Oscar nomination; two Peabodys; and the prestigious Mark Twain Prize for American Humor. Find more info here. Follow @City_Slang

    The post Lily Tomlin coming to Ann Arbor appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Welcome Valerie Vande Panne, the new Detroit Metro Times editor

    The Detroit Metro Times, Detroit’s award-winning alternative weekly media company, is proud to announce the recent hire of Valerie Vande Panne as Editor-in-Chief. An award-winning independent journalist and Michigan native, Vande Panne’s work has appeared in Crain’s Detroit Business, The Daily Beast, and Salon, among other publications. Previously, Vande Panne attended Harvard University and was a regular contributor to The Boston Phoenix, and a news editor of High Times magazine. She has spent years covering drug policy among other subjects, including the environment, culture, lifestyle, extreme sports, and academia. “Valerie understands our business and what we expect to accomplish in Detroit. She has an excellent sense for stories that will move our readers, as well as experience with balancing print and digital content. I’m excited to have her at the paper and trust her leadership as we move forward,” said Detroit Metro Times publisher Chris Keating.

    The post Welcome Valerie Vande Panne, the new Detroit Metro Times editor appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Joumana Kayrouz to cover ‘Metro Times’

    She welcomes you when you enter Detroit, from every direction, with the one word that might just be Detroit’s biggest philosophical question: Injured? Joumana Kayrouz is deeper than the inflated image watching over Detroit, peddling justice to the poor and broken of the city. This Wednesday, Drew Philp takes us behind the billboard and into the heart of the Kayrouz quest. (And all of Brian Rozman’s photos of Kayrouz have not been retouched.) Check out MT‘s cover story, on newsstands Wednesday!

    The post Joumana Kayrouz to cover ‘Metro Times’ appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Fire at PJ’s Lager House, no people hurt

    There was a fire in an upstairs apartment at PJ’s Lager House on Monday evening. No people were hurt, although three cats belonging to the tenants died after CPR. The fire broke out around 10:30 p.m. during a show featuring Zombie Jesus & the Chocolate Sunshine Band, Curtin, and Jeffrey Jablonsky. “We just smelled smoke and someone yelled everyone has to get out,” 33-year-old Nick Leu told MLive. On the Lager House Facebook page in the early hours of the morning, a post said, “We at PJ’s lager House would like to thank everyone for their care and concern. Also, a very big THANK YOU to all who stepped up to do what they could this evening. The fire was contained to the upstairs but due to water damage in the bar, we will be closed until it can be assessed. Everyone is safe and we will keep you updated.” A later update read, “Update from the big boss. Since there was no damage to the stage side of the bar, the show will go on tomorrow! You may have to enter through the back door and there may not be a large selection of booze but we are going […]

    The post Fire at PJ’s Lager House, no people hurt appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • City Slang: Music review roundup

    Send CDs, vinyl, cassettes, demos and 8-tracks to Brett Callwood, Metro Times, 1200 Woodward Heights, Ferndale MI 48220. Email MP3s and streaming links to bcallwood@metrotimes.com. The Sugar Clouds’ Partners Don’t Do That (They Watch and be Amazed) (Wax Splat) is a nostalgic look at the psychedelic days of ’60s grooviness. Even the album cover looks like a lava lamp. The male-female vocals have a sort of Jefferson Airplane feel, and the songs are blessed with both sugary sweet pop melodies and a garage-y earthiness. The story of the band’s formation is rather interesting; the two vocalists, Greg and Melissa Host, are a divorced couple who wrote the songs in their living room. The band is still together, so this divorce was a hell of a lot more civil than any we’ve ever known of. Steffanie Christi’an has friends in fairly high places. Her new Way Too Much mini-album is being put out by Nadir Omowale’s Distorted Soul label, and she is also a regular feature on Jessica Care Moore’s Black Women Rock revue. Maybe the choice of cover image isn’t the best – she looks a bit like a Tina Turner tribute act here. But that can and should be […]

    The post City Slang: Music review roundup appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

  • Detroit councilman: Increased parking fines an ‘anti-growth strategy’

      There’s at least one city councilmember who’s less than pleased with Detroit Emergency Manager Kevyn Orr’s plan to increase all parking violation fines. Councilman Gabe Leland, whose district represents the city’s west side, issued a statement today, calling Orr’s plan a potential “deterrent” to attracting people to the city. I don’t believe the argument to raise the parking ticket fines from $30 to $45 and eliminate the $10 early payment fine are justification for this action. The emergency manager’s order to increase ticket fines places city government inefficiencies on the backs of our residents who need to do business in downtown and other parts of our city. And, this will increase the barrier for people to frequent Detroit-based establishments; likely to be a deterrent for some to shop and dine in our city. Leland suggested implementing a plan that maintains current rates for fines and reduces operating inefficiencies to collecting parking fines. “In my view, generating revenue by increasing fines when residents from neighborhoods must go downtown to get licenses and permits, attend court appointments and do other necessary business, is the wrong direction,” Leland said. “…Additionally, generating revenue using fines when we are trying to grow this city and attract […]

    The post Detroit councilman: Increased parking fines an ‘anti-growth strategy’ appeared first on Metro Times Blogs.

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Savage Love

One for the ladies

Female readers ask about their equipment issues

Q: I am 50 and a lesbian. I have had a pretty active sex life for the last 30 years, including a couple of long-term relationships. For the last three years, I've been with a woman I love very much. We have amazing sexual chemistry — by far the best I have experienced.

For the last two years, I have noticed that my clitoris is getting bigger. Not trans-man-takes-testosterone big, but substantially bigger than it has ever been. I thought it was due to a big increase in sexual excitement, but it soon became clear that the enlargement was a permanent thing. It gets much more erect than it used to and often throbs or twitches after I come.

No one's complaining. I am enjoying the heightened sexual arousal, and my girlfriend (who is very GGG) is thrilled. But why and how is this happening? Could it get even bigger? And why now? I hit menopause seven years ago, so it's not some weird hormone surge. Could our sexual connection have caused this all by itself? I don't really want to ask my gynecologist, though I did notice her checking out my equipment with wide eyes at my last checkup. —Stiffie Needs A Zipcode

A:"I always like to hear from people who are satisfied with their sex lives and relationships," says author, sex researcher, vulva-puppeteer and archrival sex-advice columnist Debby Herbenick, and I have to agree. Most of our mail comes from people who are unhappy with their sex lives, dissatisfied with their relationships, or both. It's always nice to hear from folks who are having fun.

What's not so nice is that we sometimes have to tell happy-and-satisfied folks that something may be seriously wrong.

"I would strongly encourage her to ask her gynecologist about her enlarged clitoris," says Herbenick. "She should be very clear about the fact that it has increased in size. She should let her know when she first noticed this and roughly how much she thinks it's increased in size."

If your gynecologist isn't comfortable talking with you about your clit — if she just stands there gaping at it — get a new gynecologist. Because your megaclit could be a symptom of something very, very serious.

"You need your doctor to examine your clit and rule out various medical conditions that could cause hormonal problems," says Herbenick. "Sometimes these are benign health conditions; unfortunately, sometimes they include vulvar cancers, ovarian cancers and adrenal cancers that, for example, may present with symptoms including an enlarged clitoris."

Some women believe their clitorises "grew" after menopause, but that's not usually the case. When estrogen levels drop during menopause, other parts of the vulva — such as the labia — can become flatter or less prominent, which can in turn make the clitoris appear bigger. "However, she's been in menopause for a long time," says Herbenick, "and it sounds like the clitoral change happened well into menopause." And amazing sex does not supersize clits: "High levels of arousal usually result in only a temporary swelling of the clitoris," says Herbenick.

So make another appointment to see your doctor, SNAZ, "and keep asking questions until she's sure that medical conditions, such as cancers, have been ruled out," urges Herbenick.

And, again, if your gynecologist doesn't want to discuss it or was too stupid to spot what could be a symptom of common lady-parts cancers (!), time to get a new gynecologist.


Q:
My husband is beautiful, awesome, etc. Unfortunately, his dick is small. It wasn't so bad our first few years together; he knows how to work what he's got. But then I had a baby, and I tore. A few days later, my stitches tore. My six-week checkup turned out to be a poke in the stomach to confirm that my uterus was back in place, and when I asked why I couldn't get restitched, the doctor told me, "Vaginas are very forgiving." But a year later, Kegels aren't helping and both of us are having trouble getting off.

He enjoys anal sex, but it's not really fulfilling for me. I want to get a vaginoplasty to fit him, but I'll have to wait till we've saved up enough money to pay for it. Please, Dan, tell me how to have hotter sex with a small dick and a shredded kitty. —Unforgiving

A: "Many women who have had multiple or traumatic births — and it sounds like she had a good deal of tearing — have some degree of prolapse," says Herbenick. (A uterine prolapse, says the Wiki, "occurs when the female pelvic organs fall from their normal position, into or through the vagina.")

"If she did have prolapse," says Herbenick, "she may be a candidate for anterior or posterior vaginal wall repair, which is quite similar to vaginal 'rejuvenation' surgeries, and then insurance may cover the surgery.

"Some people will wildly disagree with me and say that women shouldn't have surgery 'to please their man,' but I don't see that here," Herbenick adds. "I see two people who are married and want better sex, and she may have experienced some physical changes that have affected that. And there are ways to fix it."

Debby Herbenick is the associate director of the Center for Sexual Health Promotion at Indiana University and the author of Because It Feels Good: A Woman's Guide to Sexual Pleasure and Satisfaction, a book that I strongly recommend even though Debby once attacked me with a vulva puppet in a room full of people.


Q:
I live in Ann Arbor, Michigan. Grange, a local restaurant, has a cocktail called "GGGinger." Is it possible for a cocktail to be GGG? And how does it feel to have inspired one? —Curious Cocktail Connection

A: A cocktail can't be GGG, CCC, but a couple of cocktails — enough to take the edge off inhibitions, not so much to make consent unpossible — can induce GGG. And, I'm saddened to report, the GGGinger's Gs refer to three of the gin-based cocktail's ingredients — ginger beer, candied ginger and ginger syrup — and not to the Savage Love meme "good, giving and game." Still, Grange co-owner Brandon Johns is confident that his GGGingers have inspired GGG behavior all over Ann Arbor.

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