Published: December 14, 2011
As for those troubling mental images: The passage of time is your body's enemy on the physical-perfection front — and his too — but it's your best friend on the searing-mental-images front, SIP. The more time you two spend doing, enjoying and perfecting X, Y and Z sex acts, the more X, Y and Z becomes about you two and your connection. As you take ownership over X, Y and Z, and over each other again, the mental images will come to you less often, they'll be less vivid, and gradually they'll cease. Give it time.
A letter in a recent column was from a guy who's trying to figure out how to get into gay BDSM. You suggested some advice from a gay BDSM blogger — Ben in Leather Land (tinyurl.com/bensten) — and it was awesome. Do you have any suggestions of similar blogs for women into BDSM? —Looking Lady
Sex writer, blogger, thinker and haver Tristan Taormino, who is publishing a new book about BDSM and kinky sex (The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge), recommends fetish icon Midori's column in SexIs magazine (tinyurl.com/edenmidori) for women who are just beginning to explore kink.
Hey, everybody: We're seeking sordid and tragic stories of holiday sex for an upcoming episode of the Savage Lovecast. Ever been caught having sex at Mom and Dad's over the holidays? Ever put a "For Grandma, from Santa!" card on a wrapped box that contained a sex toy you bought for someone else? Did your older brothers stick your vibrator in the tree before a Christmas party, and you had to leave it there because reaching into the tree to remove it would only attract attention to it? Call and record your story at 206-201-2720! Please keep it under three minutes, if at all possible!
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