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Savage Love

Intended for pleasure

Engaged lovers encounter kinks before trying to tie the knot

A:

 I'm glad you met the love of your life, STW, and here's hoping your new man doesn't have a secret kink that's as bad or worse — or identical to — your previous man's rather harmless kink. Yes, yes, being into golden showers, or getting off on being pissed on, is pretty kinky, as kinks go. But after a few beers, piss is just so much hot water. I'm not saying you should've gone there for your ex, if pissing on him was something you absolutely, positively couldn't bring yourself to do. All I'm saying is that most people who give piss a chance quickly realize that golden showers aren't nearly as gross and disgusting — or even golden — as they were led to believe by people who lump piss in with shit when discussing and/or freaking out about other people's kinks.

 

Q:

 That was a great response you gave to the woman who was concerned about her boyfriend stroking his dick and the cat at the same time. I mean, sometimes I'll start absentmindedly jerking off while watching TV, and it has absolutely nothing to do with what's on the screen. What if someone walked in and saw me beating off and Geraldo was on the screen? The two things are completely unconnected, and any reasonable person would realize that! —Not Geraldo Tonight

 

A:

 Thanks!

 

 

Find Dan Savage's weekly podcast every Tuesday at thestranger.com/savage. Send letters to mail@savagelove.net.

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