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Savage Love

Going it alone

Sorry Mom and Dad: More and more people are deciding to stay single longer

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By Dan Savage

Published: November 28, 2012

So what should you tell your nagging friends and family?

"How about letting them know that going solo is what works best for him right now," says Klinenberg, "but that he's hardly made a vow to stay single forever. Or, if he's feeling feisty, he can remind them that, no matter how they've arranged their lives at the moment, someday they might find themselves opting out of sex and relationships too."

What should you do if you change your mind someday? You should date, IDGAF, you should marry. Don't describe your current choices as superior — even if it does mean a better social life — and you won't have to eat crow if you change your mind.

"We've come a long way in our attitudes about sex and relationships," says Klinenberg. "Now that living alone is more common than living with a spouse and two children, isn't it time we learned to respect the choice to go solo too?"

Indeed it is. And the sooner you demand a little respect from your parents and friends for your choices, IDGAF, the sooner you'll get it.

Single and partnered people alike should follow Eric Klinenberg on Twitter: @EricKlinenberg. To find out more about Klinenberg's books and his research, go to ericklinenberg.com.

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